Day 54: Write down the interior monologue you experience when you sit down to write.

Here goes.

Okay, let the words flow. Flow. Flow. Spice, spice must flow. Creepy floaty thing in a tank. Fish.

No, focus. Let’s get four hundred words done and then we can go get a beer. Mmm… I like beer. I’ll go for the Vintage Hen. Maybe the Hobgoblin. Or I could have a cider. I know, I’ll go and have a look and see what there is and then come back to write.

(Time passes)

Okay. Now we can get started. The Hen is pretty good. So now, just four hundred words. I can do four hundred words, easily. I just need to focus.

(Time passes, no words are written)

Kapow! Take that, alien monstrosity! It’s fine, it’s justified, it was all for inspiration. This way, I settle my brain into the fugue state that it needs to let the words flow through me and into the keyboard. Soon, I’ll see it. I’ll see my fingertips dancing, like leaves on the wind. I should write that down.

Nope, scratch that. It’s from Serenity. And now I’m too sad to write. Come on! Write. Write. Scribe. Just get a grip!

Nope, I’m watching TV instead. There’s bound to be something on. Oooh, Big Bang Theory. This’ll do.

No. Seen that one. Fine! I’ll write. Stupid, bloody compulsion. Why did I pick this as a hobby? Why couldn’t I choose something easier, like wrestling crocodiles or fire juggling?

Wait. That’s it. I found the character. That’s who she is. She’s a circus performer, a fire juggler. She dances in the night and the flames dance with her. Is she magic? No, not magic. Just talent, pure and simple. The way it should be. But why am I writing her?

She’s malcontent. She is unhappy with her lot. She wants more, she wants to perform for more than just the crowds of a hundred, she wants to be a star. She wants to let the flames dance for everyone. Wait, this could make her a villain. She does sound villainistic.

Yes. That’s what I’ll do. This isn’t a character, it’s an origin story. Why is she obsessed with the flames? Why is she-?

Oh crap, is that the time? I need to get some of this down, then I’m going to bed. I’ll come back to her later. I’ll call her… Lila. Flamesmistress Lila Hartwell.

I like it. I like it a lot.

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